The older I get, the clearer it becomes that life is a process of becoming. Not a fixed state. But stages we go through. Wisdom is slow reveal. An experience that compounds. There's no arrival. Only lessons learned. We grow. One hard lesson at a time. You don't get all the answers at once.
You earn them step by step.
That's why Philosopher and astronomer Hypatia's wisdom makes a lot of sense. She notes, "Life is an unfoldment, and the further we travel the more truth we can comprehend. To understand the things that are at our door is the best preparation for understanding those that lie beyond." Hypatia's idea of life as an "unfoldment" is spot on.
Like any journey, you start local. Right where you are.
"Life is growth, and the more we travel, the more truth we can understand. Understanding the things that surround us is the best preparation to understand the things that lie beyond," she wrote.
Erik Erikson, a developmental psychologist, thought every stage of life has its own challenge. And its own wisdom. "The sense of identity provides the ability to experience one's self as something that has continuity and sameness, and to act accordingly," he said.
Experience is the slow teacher. It compounds. Like interest. The more you live, the more it gives back. But only if you pay attention.
Most people look for meaning "out there." In big goals. In future plans. In things they haven't experienced yet. But the best place to begin is here, now. Right at your own front door. That's why I've stopped rushing answers. I've started sitting with questions.
Poet Rainer Maria Rilke once said, "Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer."
And I do.
Because clarity comes from living, not just thinking.
Understanding grows with experience.
Some things become more obvious as you age. Things you couldn't understand ten years ago, most likely make sense now. Because you grew. You didn't just read more. You lived more. You saw things break. You saw things heal. Those experiences changed you. They gave you new realities. There's a term for it: epistemic humility. It's knowing that your understanding is always partial, always in progress. The ancient Greeks were big on this. Socrates said, "The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing." Staying curious with the mindset that "life is an unfoldment" is how you allow life to pass through you, with you and for you.
Truth evolves.
What's true for you today might not be true tomorrow. You change. It's like reading a book twice. The words don't change, but you do. And that changes everything. This is why Hypatia's message matters. She is saying handle what's in front of you. Face it with honesty. That prepares you for the bigger stuff later. It's tempting to want answers now. But I've come to believe that wisdom has a pace. You can't rush it. Some people jump ahead, hungry for big answers, only to realise they've skipped foundational truths.
Understanding begins with patience.
And presence.
You take yourself wherever you go.
That's why understanding what's "at your door" is so important. It builds the inner scaffolding for bigger truths. It's the foundation. The stronger it is, the more you can hold.
I aim to live by Hypatia's words every day. I can't race towards the distant truth. Or wisdom. I can only pay close attention to the experience in front of me. I trust that life will unfold. Not all at once, but exactly when I am ready for it. You don't have to understand everything today. You just have to be willing to experience all of life. In your thoughts, relationships and fears. The better you understand those, the better you'll understand everything else. What confuses you today will make sense tomorrow.
Experience is always the missing teacher.
Life will always be a process of self-becoming. It will shrink or expand in proportion to the experience you are willing to tolerate. I like what writer Anais Nin said, "Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death."
Lean into your own story.
Pay attention to what challenges you, what teaches you, what moves you. That awareness prepares you for everything else that's coming. Every experience, every lesson, reveals another layer of understanding. Hypatia's wisdom wasn't just for ancient Alexandria. It's for you, and me, today. Pay attention to today's lessons. They're preparing you for tomorrow's mysteries. The farther you go, the more you'll realise, life's hidden truths were never far away. They were always at your door, waiting for you to notice. Keep walking. Keep learning.
Grow into the answers.